I fell down last week and ended up with a nasty bruise, a distasteful abrasion— both painful— and some medicine which made my world feel pretty good considering the circumstances.

For two days.

One of the side effects of the medicine is a bladder that refuses to empty. Full bladder equals discomfort. Over full bladder equals significant pain. Think Dr. House on the TV show House. His addiction to pain medicine caused him to use a catheter to pee.

Catheters are not exactly uncommon but they can be painful to insert, painful to remove, and painful while just sitting there and moving urine from the bladder to a nearby bag.

The commonality is pain.

The paradox?

an argument that apparently derives self-contradictory conclusions by valid deduction from acceptable premises… one (such as a person, situation, or action) having seemingly contradictory qualities or phases

Bad news, meet good news. With a catheter you don’t have to get up to go to the bathroom when the urge arises to pee. I can feel the urge a bit as the bladder fills but then it subsides because the catheter did all the work and the pee automatically went into the bag.

That’s kinda nice, actually, hence the paradox. Catheter bad. Catheter good.

I still want it out.